WINNER
PISSONNETEER OF THE YEAR
JEANETTE OESTERMYER
Rochester, Indiana
NOAH'S FEAT
Rain falls, stalls drain; stream flows, knows theme; dove flies, cries love.
Ark park.
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PISSONNETRY ON PARADE
The Pissonnet is the world's shortest sonnet and the only known sonnet written horizontally like pissant tracks across the page in single-syllable words (except for the title, which is Poet's Choice). It was invented by Wanda Sue Parrott, with the assistance of Vera-Jane Goodin Schultz, in a coffee shop in Springfield, Missouri in 1998. It entered the Poetic Public Domain in 2004. Today it is frequently featured in poetry contests and in publications both online and in the print medium. The Pissonnet, which may be pronounced pee-so-nay if a poet so chooses, is often a poet's choice of a form to enter in contests. Wanda Sue Parrott and Vera-Jane Goodin Schultz are known in Missouri as "The Pissant Poets from Planet Pissantium." Here in a mini-time capsule are the pioneering Pissonneteers of the Pissonnet's first decade of existence:
WORLD'S 1st PISSONNET (1998)
Wanda Sue Parrott and Vera-Jane Goodin Schultz, Springfield, Mo.
MALE BONDING IN THE WILD
Bright May day fright; brush shakes, makes rush; bear growls; howls scare
“RUN, son!”
WORLD'S 2nd PISSONNET (1998)
Wanda Sue Parrott and Vera-Jane Goodin Schultz, Springfield, Mo.
BIRD WATCHER'S VISION
Gaze high; sky, haze. Farts fly. Eye smarts. Dropped gift swift plopped.
Bird turd
WORLD'S FIRST PISSONNETEER (1998)
Tom Padgett, Bolivar, Mo.
NIAGARA FALLS, VIAGRA CALLS!
How man can now shove mate late love if pill will stiff
limp wimp.
OTHER PISSONNETEERS OF THE DECADE 1999—2007
(in alphabetical order by last name)
Claude Blackwood, Memphis, Tenn.
KNOCK OUT ENDS BOUT
Throws punch, crunch nose. Blow felt, knelt low. Sends right, fight ends.
Deep sleep.
Dena R. Gorrell, Edmond, Okla.
NEIGHBOR'S TREES SHARE BOUNTY (LEAF GRIEF)
Trees all tall; he's got shade made. Not us: breeze, trees, muss. . .
Take rake!
Irmgard Haden, Ava, Mo.
HOW TO WRITE A PISSONNET
Few nouns bounce, hew 'till thought caught. Will fail. Cry. Hail!
Terse verse!
Karri Lyn Halley, Bolivar, Mo.
APRIL 15th STRIKES AGAIN
Hate tax, max rate. Had gain, pain bad. See cash dash free.
No dough.
Shirl Hummel, Foristell, Mo.
OUR EXCITING HALF-HOUR BOATING ADVENTURE
Sails fluff, luff fails. Craft tips, flips aft. We float boat free.
Reach beach!
Jo McNally, Stroudsburg, Pa.
INSOMNIA
Hot bath hath not made dream, scheme laid: drink scotch watch pink
Sheep leap.
Yvonne Nunn, Hermleigh, Tex.
RAPTURE
Ground shakes, quakes mound; sand sifts, shifts land; stone rolls, scrolls moan.
God nod.
Nancy A. Richards, St. Louis, Mo.
REBIRTH
Voice sighs; cries choice; heart wakes, makes start; face glows, knows grace.
New you.
William Sowell, DeLand, Fla.
HOW E-BAY GOT STARTED
Sell stuff. Tough spell. Go net. Sweat dough. Swell calls. All's well.
Is biz!
Sherlu Walpole, Springfield, Mo.(2-time winner)
A LA CARTE
Meal: ale, quail, eel, beans, ham, lamb, greens, deer, kraut, trout, beer.
Ill. Pill.
VICTORY
Teams. Brags. Flags. Screams. Prize prods squads' tries. Game done. Won fame.
Up cup!
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